Little helper

Tiny little helper

Round and oh so smooth 

I look at you lovingly 

Like I would an old friend

You look so pretty in the palm of my hand

Yet you bring darkness and autonomy 

To my already autonomous head

We never made the decision 

To be together 

But it was necessary

Or so they said 

Through the years I have loved you

Through the years I have despised you

I feel shame at the strength 

Of the cord which binds my brain to you

I always take to much

I never take enough

Fuck it I have made the decision to be done 

My madness should be mine and mine alone to judge.

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3 thoughts on “Little helper

  1. I feel this way all to often. I look into the pill bottle to count how many I have left and it seems like pills form a smiley face trying to entice me. Pop one of these, or 2 or 3 and 45 minutes later your whole outlook on life is altered. Better. Stronger.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Exactly! We’re not all blessed with chemical balance! I often think about my life before the meds and I am thankful for them you know. At the same time they’re also my crutch love to you 😘

      Like

    2. It’s nice to know I’m not the only one! Yes the meds are almost like superpowers. I look back often on my life before them and am amazed and grateful for how they’ve helped me. I also feel bound to them it’s crazy love to you girl 😘

      Like

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